Most of our instincts and culture have their roots in the cave and our need to perpetuate our species against all the odds nature could throw at us. We have bundled them up with ceremony and cultural norms like ribbons and wrapping paper, but that doesn't change the package.

Very few such norms are even minimally conducive to personal happiness and don't even aptly apply to a world already knee deep in our prodigy making the survival they were meant to enable less likely, not more. One should never feel that tending to personal happiness is somehow a failure for our common humanity or selfish in any way. We have far more than enough children bogged down in the regrets of their parents to keep therapists in clover for a couple of generations.